Daycare Blues

Darling Daughter (DD) had her first day at daycare last week. When Darling Husband (DH) and I dropped her off, she got straight down on the floor and started playing with all the toys. We stayed for about 10 minutes and when we left, we picked her up for a kiss and cuddle and she wanted to squirm out of our arms.

I'm lucky that we are in a position where she only goes one day a week and we can ease her into the hours. So the plan was to only leave her there for four hours.

We dropped her off at 8 and I have to admit that I really struggled to leave. I was all brave until I got to the car and I started getting teary. DH just doesn't seem to understand why I felt so bad though. 

So I drove home in the pouring rain and parked in my driveway and sobbed. The weather suited my mood perfectly. Why was it so hard? Why did I feel like I was leaving her? Why did my heart feel like it had shattered?

I came inside for about five minutes and decided that it was too hard to hang around all her toys. So what did I do? I went to the shops. I got birthday presents sorted, I had a coffee (which was free due to a voucher), and just wandered aimlessly. Then I decided to hit the other shopping centre for a while. 

Finally at midday, I went back to pick her up. Only to find that she was asleep. Deflated, I came home, again. Wrapped the presents I bought, went to the toilet in peace and then drove the long way to the daycare centre. At 1pm she was awake and had just done her very first painting. 

The smile I got when I walked into the room cleared all the rain clouds and I felt whole again, with my little girl with me. 

I'm still emotional over it and we've only got 2 more days before she goes again.

Please tell me it gets easier?!

Today I'm linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT (I Blog On Tuesday)